This blog post is a product of two girls on an emotional rollercoaster, hiking 13.1 miles on a rollercoaster of a trail (beach, forest, mountains) to this beautiful waterfall where a message was etched in wood. “L-O-V-E”.
On the two and a half hours down I kept singing songs in my head and thinking about the message at the waterfall. We are the hard working, deep loving, never-give up-until-we’re there-kind of girls. Though, this whole time we’ve been doing it for others and not for ourselves.
Self love and love of others are actually like peanut butter & jelly (you’re sandwich really shouldn’t have one without the other). As someone who has been in too many unhealthy relationships to count, all this time I thought love is when you NEED that other person. Until recently (and sometimes I slip up), I didn’t recognize my self worth. If you know your worth you don’t actually NEED anyone else. You NEED you. When you choose to open your heart up to someone you are choosing to because you WANT them. You choose them, but you will survive without them. Reflecting on my past relationships, that’s not healthy to need someone else, no matter how much you love and care for someone.
I was recently asked what I wanted from life right now. I didn’t really know how to answer that. Partly due to the weight of the question and who I was talking to I felt that I needed to check myself before I wrecked myself so, I just said, “I want to love myself. But man, I want a lot”. Looking back after the 13.1 mile realization, that’s just it. I WANT a lot, I don’t NEED a lot. I’m choosing this. I WANT to, I CHOOSE to and that’s what’s letting me know this is the only place for me.